This morning is one with alarming news. I felt like I got run over by a train twice in a span of 20 minutes. Train No. 1 was when my dad told me my maid went crazy last evening during dinner. The story I heard, very ridiculous, I didn't believe it when dad told me because it was just too, erm, out of this world. Supposedly, my parents went home for dinner after work, like they do, for the last 30 years. And while my mum went to her room to change (or something like that), my dad went into the kitchen to cut some fruits (my dad prefers to cut his own fruits, heh). The maid had just finished cooking the dishes and was taking them out to the dining room. When she went back to the kitchen to scoop the rice out, she realised she had forgotten to cook the rice. Ok, this is not very unbelievable, because it is possible to forget to do something, even though you've been doing it for your whole life. So then, my dad went like, "Why are you distracted? You want to go home is it? (Because she had just received a letter from her family back in Indonesia a couple of days ago.) Go wash the rice now before Mam comes down." She then proceeded to wash the rice in the "inside kitchen" (we have 2 kitchens, see, one in the backyard and the actual kitchen), to which my dad say "Don't wash here, wash outside." It was then she went all crazy. But she didn't look crazy, she probably just looked psychotic. Very seriously, she said to my dad, "Why? You scared I poison the rice is it?" -_-!! My dad pretended not to hear. But she continued, "I am God, I don't need to eat. You don't believe?" She pulled my dad out to the altar (we have an altar at home, just next to the dining table for the ancestors and the gods) and pointed to the Guan Yin figurine and said, "I am God." Alright. My goodness. I burst out laughing when my dad told me that. I mean it sounds all too ridiculous! But my dad was freaked. Quite funny! That night, my dad brought her back to the agency to sort things out and thought it would be best to just send her home. She might be just acting, so that we'll send her home fast, or she was genuinely crazy. Either way, I'm just glad she's gone. Not a very good maid, that woman. How can you be working with a family for one year and still not know the "workings" of the family? And it's not a big family, only 3 of us!! C-R-A-P. So now we're maidless again. Oh no!! *shudders at the thought of washing clothes, washing toilet* Argh. Train No. 2 was when Dad told me his friend knew my sister's husband, who, effectively, is my brother-in-law. Ok, for some, this sentence would bring about alot "Huh, Selena got sister meh? I thought she's the only child?" Let me clear your doubts. I have a sister. Or should I say, I used to have a sister. But she left home. As in, not married and left the family, but she "ran away from home". Not once, but twice! Hmm. Since then, I've always told people who asked, that I'm the only child. Save the explanation. And all the awkward glances and silence which always seem to follow these kind of news. Hahaha. Well, she's married now. With 2 kids in tow. Hrmm, I'm effectively, their auntie ley. Wah lao, damn cool can. But sadly, I have absolutely no idea where she is now, what she's working as, how her kids look like, how her wedding went, etc etc. I'm hardened by all these already, actually. Having been left out of all these. I mean, hey, she didn't invite anyone in the family ( I think, or maybe she did, but they didn't inform my dad, those buggers). But I would have very much liked to be part of her life. Honestly. I look back at my childhood photos, when I was one, she was there at my birthday party! We took a very sisterly photo together. Hahaha. Then there was also our trip back to Malaysia to visit my uncles, she was there too! We took photos as well! Got chance I show you all. Very cute one. She doesn't live with us, she lived with my uncle and his family. I think. It was so long ago, it's all fuzzy now. I figured I better write this down soon, if not I'll probably forget everything in time to come. Ok, something like that la. Just that she didn't live with us. So weird hor, you might be asking. I don't really know why, don't dare to ask also, scared kena scolded. But we used to go out every weekend, with my grandmother when she was still alive. Back then, I didn't really feel that she was my sister, I just felt that she was my cousin or something like that. Then when I was in P6, she was already 21 then, (age gap 9 years), just started her degree @ NUS (ya she's the smart kid in the family) and she moved in with us but she stayed in hall anyways. So it's still, weekends then go out, sort of thing. Then just before PSLE, I still remember, I was studying for my Chinese or something, she came home with a guy, her boyfriend I presume. And promptly announced she was leaving the family. My dad refused to let her into the house. She didn't have a lot of stuff at home anyway, so she just left it all behind. Before she left, she saw me peeking out from my room window, said something like, "You're not fit to be my sister." Something along that line. I was too young to be affected by that sentence and I was too caught up with PSLE anyway. I just remember crying a lot because my dad was shouting and hammering stuff and my mum was just super-pissed. So drama hor? But shortly afterwards, she came to look for me in school. Methinks just before I finished primary school. And she asked me to asked Mum and Dad to let her back home. I was damn happy la! Like yay! I have a sister again! Mum and Dad were actually quite reluctant to let her back, but I think I was quite persuasive. Anyways, she came back and Dad was so happy he bought our present house so that we could have more room! (we were staying in a 3-room flat before this) But then, I guess, happy stuff don't last long. About a couple of months later, we woke up one morning to find that she had emptied her cupboards, shelves, drawers, table of her stuff. In the wastepaper basket were notes she had tried to write, beginning with "To whom it may concern", then scribbled off and crushed. She never finished the note. My dad was furious. He hammered the door, (we had to have it replaced 'cos it cracked in the middle, he was THAT furious) and started pounding his chest. I guess he was just really disappointed, more than angry, that his eldest daughter had left him once again. How did I react, you might be wondering. I was just heartbroken. I remember I sat in her room for awhile when my parents went out and just stared at the stuff she left behind, lied down on the bed she used to sleep in, sat on the chair she sat on when she was studying at her desk. Just soaking in the emptiness. Somehow I already expected this. Her leaving I mean. I don't think she felt the kind of ties and closeness I felt with my parents. Maybe it had to do with the fact that she didn't live with us when she was young. Maybe it was something else. I don't know. I never got to find out. And I never will.